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Online vs. Traditional Dating

Discuss About The Motivations Using Dating Application Tinder?

This essay discusses various aspects of dating a person, finding the similarities between two persons and finally ends up in a happy life. over the years and decades, the tradition and concept of dating has been changed. Before the technological advancements, two people used to meet and identified their similarities and if they shared same perspectives, stated to date each other (Ramirez et al. 2014). Gradually, with the technological advancements, this new generation of people prefer new and advanced technology and updated tools of dating there are numerous differences in the online and traditional methods of dating.

Many of the people realise that there are no such differences in the traditional and online dating. This is because most of the people think that the main idea of dating someone is to find special perform in life and both the approaches are about detailed communication with that person in order to know him or her better. However, some people prefer traditional dating and some prefer online. To people the concept of online dating is very new and exciting when both people start to communicate. On the other hand, the traditional method of dating usually involves two people who have some similarity in their psychological demands.

The traditional dating procedure makes the potential matches made up of two locals, colleagues or friends of the friends. Here, one needs time to identify the similarities in the lifestyles, personality traits and emotional values (Smith and Anderson 2016). On the contrary the online dating process provides scope for interacting with thousands of prospective people then selects one according to the emotional matching. Here one can get various types of filters where the people can search according to the preferences for example hobbies, personalities, religion and most importantly perspective or point of view about any incident.


A lot of people wonder; which method will be more fruitful for them to choose between. Time is big payer in differentiating the similarities and differences between two major style of dating (Sumter, Vandenbosch and Ligtenberg 2017). Most of the people now a day have been choosing the online method because they do not have time to approach any stranger and ask for a date. Moreover, the single people now a day do not have time to attain social events as well as meet new people for date. For these people social networking sites are easy and comfortable platform to meet new people without any stress and interact them. For online dating, one can have a huge opportunity to gain access to approach qualified and prospective single when search according to the category of choice.

Positives of Traditional Dating

However, in both traditional and online dating methods, there are some positives as well as some negatives therefore the individual must select the method most convincing, dependable and affordable methods of dating someone (Heijman et al. 2016). However, both of these methods have some positive and some negative effects that influence the person but vary sometimes. Before the concept of online dating was first introduced, people used to connect via personal ads and mutual friends. Even today also the people supporting traditional outlook do not believe in the credibility of the online dating system. The positive sides of offline dating method are-

First, people can determine the chemistry face to face. In offline dating process people meet others for the first time therefore, cannot judge their appearance or personality before meeting. As these people do not share much information before they meet hence get opportunity to discuss more about themselves in a date. This makes their conversation more exciting and deep as people ask about each other and get answers right there. People do not wait for getting answers for weeks and months hence need less time to know basic characteristics of each other.  

Secondly, as the data reveals, most of the people in the online dating methods do not follow ethics and moralities abut lie about themselves very easily. For example, the women deceive their ages and men tend to add in their incomes (Dowlat and Donaldson 2017). On the other hand, in the traditional dating process, people have conversation face to face, their conscience wins out. Moreover, the people get scope for follow-up questions to reveal their true identity.

Thirdly, most of the dating in the traditional methods are arranged by either friends, co-workers, or relatives which makes it easier for the people with increasing the compatibility of the people. Therefore, this dating becomes more exiting as these are based on the similar preferences of both parts.

Finally, as mentioned before, people get engaged in their dating through known people of friends, families or the co-workers. Hence, they get scope for asking their common friends about each other, which can never happen in the online match making system.

There are negative aspects of the traditional dating methods where firstly, the traditional dating needs some movements from one end therefore one has to be sociable and eloquent. In such settings, many of the people fail to build engagement with completely a stranger (Heijman et al. 2016).

Negatives of Traditional Dating

Secondly, arranging a date traditionally depends on one person therefore, he has to take entire responsibilities. Moreover, people tend to remain in their own comfortable area hence traditional dating makes it harder to expand your physical boundaries.


Thirdly, while deciding to meet each other through traditional dating process, the people can surely run out of time. In this busy society, one lacks time to build a strong emotional as well as intellectual bond because this need time and effort.

Fourthly, people choosing the traditional are limited in the local and social circles. On the other hand, the users availing online dating services, people can find their partners from every corners of the world (Heijman et al. 2016). Therefore, when all the sources of prospective partners are exhausted the people go for choice of the family and friends.

Finally, people preferring the traditional method of dating face difficulties in case of their first date. This is because, people remain experienced about the key features of dating hence they fail to impress each other and end up in zero. In case both of the people have no idea of each other out going in a first date, disaster happens.

As mentioned before, both of the methods have some positive and negative aspects which either make them similar to each other or differentiate (Holt 2017). The positive effects of the online dating are as follows-

Firstly, the online dating process allows the users to make choice from the numerous single people and it assures that they all have same objectives that are to start a relationship with the most preferred person (Fullwood and Attrill-Smith 2018). They do not need to confirm or convince anybody for dating.

Secondly, the online dating networks allow their users to choose among a sea of people each categorised with religion, personality and inclinations. These online dating sites cater for every type of people. This is much easier for the young generation that saves time as well as works efficiently.

Thirdly, this method is affordable for most of the people as they do not need to arrange anything for creating physical ambience. One can connect another without physical presence and much effort to reach them (Manning 2014).

Fourthly, online dating survives helps to engage in platonic communicating. The users have enough time to know each other and express themselves which are sometimes difficult sitting face to face.

Fifthly, although it seems to be unbelievable, the number of marriage after online dating is much higher than offline dating. Couples whose relationships began online are quite immune to separations, because their romance started long-distance relationship (Fullwood and Attrill-Smith 2018). These couples got to know each other psychologically.

Positives of Online Dating

Sixthly, many of the online dating or matchmaking sites use popular matchmaking tools which are quite scientific and analytical. These tools are used to make perfect match according to the psychological and intellectual needs of the users (Mazur 2017). These tools are preferred by the considerable number of users who feel that these tools are more efficient in matchmaking that human beings. However, for getting appropriate results, the users need to input proper information about their requirements and themselves.


Moreover, in online dating sites the people communicate over internet and continue their conversation at any place of choice (Peng and Cao 2017). Hence, one need not to go out with a complete stranger which make this process quite safer than another process.

Communication is no doubt an important factor that assists to mingle with people and build a relationship based on love and emotional connection. Online dating process helps in starting the initial communication which ultimately leads them to engagement with each other.

Finally, one of the most important aspects of online dating facility is that one can easily subscribe or delete their accounts from the dating sites. The people having account in the online dating services will have opportunity to close if they do not want to continue with the categories or do not feel these services to be fruitful for their objectives.

There are numerous negative aspects of online or virtual dating process. First of all, there are numerous people in the world with worse intentions. These people intentionally play with this concept of dating and intentionally cheat people (Ramirez et al. 2014). For accessing these online sites one need no proof of name hence it is easy to be anonymous. This is why many of the people report of cheating.

Secondly, online dating process is more engaging for the online users because they stay online and chat for a considerable amount of time. Therefore, this method becomes boring after some weeks or months as one comes to know all about a person. They tend to leave that person and try another one. Therefore, the researchers have found that online dating has become more like a game that after a while it becomes discouraging (Felmlee and Kreager 2017).

Thirdly, as mentioned before, the online dating facilities provide various categories from where people select their dates according to their choice. This concept however matches with the ecommerce business where people select clothes or shoes from according to their preferences. People subscribed in these sites become too judgemental about the physicality or appearances. They scroll and swipe treating people like objects.

Negatives of Online Dating


Fourthly, the scientific match making tools are used in matchmaking procedure hence the users cannot include every detail in their accounts (Borrajoet al. 2015). These users are judged in limited categories hence this judgement can never be accurate and dependable.

Finally, people while dating online, tend to exaggerate about them and pretend superior which they are not. Sitting before a PC or mobile, it becomes easy for the people to lie immorally.

There are numerous differences between the online and offline dating methods. The most import of this is the psychological involvement. Some of the people prefer traditional style of dating as they feel when they meet a stranger they find something new in them and there is an amazing experience to explore each other (Van Ouytsel, Ponnet and Walrave 2016). This is how they learn to depend thus, gradually building a psychological bond. On the contrary, online dating is purely focus on giving some kind of experience of dating. Many of the people cannot become engaged with their partners as they cannot build emotional attachment without physical appearance.

This is the reason why many of the sociologists recommend for applying both these type of dating process. This is because traditional method of dating was there in the society for a long time but this technology driven online dating process is quite new. This may not be altered in this situation. Hence, people will be benefitted if they select his or her partner based on their preferences from online dating sites, then go on a date traditionally. Thus, they will have minimum knowledge about their inclinations or similarities and then share a strong emotional or intellectual bond.

References:

Borrajo, E., Gámez-Guadix, M., Pereda, N. and Calvete, E., 2015. The development and validation of the cyber dating abuse questionnaire among young couples. Computers in Human Behavior, 48, pp.358-365.

Dowlat, R.A. and Donaldson, S.I., 2017. Toward a Positive Psychology of Online Romantic Relationships: A New Frontier?. Toward a Positive Psychology of Relationships: New Directions in Theory and Research, p.77.

Felmlee, D.H. and Kreager, D.A., 2017. The Invisible Contours of Online Dating Communities: A Social Network Perspective. Journal of Social Structure, 18, pp.0_1-27.

Fullwood, C. and Attrill-Smith, A., 2018. Up-dating: ratings of perceived dating success are better online than offline. Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, 21(1), pp.11-15.

Heijman, T., Stolte, I., Geskus, R., Matser, A., Davidovich, U., Xiridou, M. and van der Loeff, M.S., 2016. Does online dating lead to higher sexual risk behaviour? A cross-sectional study among MSM in Amsterdam, the Netherlands. BMC infectious diseases, 16(1), p.288.

Holt, M., 2017. Cavalcade of the Uninspired: One Woman’s Adventures in the Strange World of (Mostly Online) Post-Divorce Dating.

Manning, J., 2014. Construction of values in online and offline dating discourses: Comparing presentational and articulated rhetorics of relationship seeking. Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication, 19(3), pp.309-324.

Mazur, E., 2017. Diverse Disabilities and Dating Online. In Identity, Sexuality, and Relationships among Emerging Adults in the Digital Age (pp. 150-167). IGI Global.

Peng, K. and Cao, B., 2017. Being online daters or not: Effects of individual factors, peers influence, and social reality.

Ramirez, A., Sumner, E.M., Fleuriet, C. and Cole, M., 2014. When online dating partners meet offline: The effect of modality switching on relational communication between online daters. Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication, 20(1), pp.99-114.

Smith, A. and Anderson, M., 2016. 5 facts about online dating. Pew Research, 29.

Sumter, S.R., Vandenbosch, L. and Ligtenberg, L., 2017. Love me Tinder: Untangling emerging adults’ motivations for using the dating application Tinder. Telematics and Informatics, 34(1), pp.67-78.

Van Ouytsel, J., Ponnet, K. and Walrave, M., 2016. Cyber dating abuse victimization among secondary school students from a lifestyle-routine activities theory perspective. Journal of interpersonal violence, p.0886260516629390.

Van Ouytsel, J., Walrave, M., Ponnet, K. and Temple, J.R., 2016. Digital forms of dating violence: what school nurses need to know. NASN school nurse, 31(6), pp.348-353.

Whyte, M.K., 2018. Dating, mating, and marriage. Routledge.

Wolak, J., Finkelhor, D., Walsh, W. and Treitman, L., 2018. Sextortion of minors: characteristics and dynamics. Journal of Adolescent Health, 62(1), pp.72-79.

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