The Continuing Bond Model And Attachment Theory In Grief Counseling

Theories of Grieving: An Overview

The present paper aims to perform a thoroughly researched discussion on two theories of grieving that deal with the models. In the current years, the general approaches towards grief counseling and the various theories that the process entails have changed considerably. These are relatively new models in the concept of psychotherapy. In order to understand the concept, it is imperative to understand the genesis of the term as well as the concept. The term ‘grief work’ was originally coined by the famous psychotherapist, Sigmund Freud (Godley, 2018). The term represents an individual’s experience of emotion as well as the distinct expression of emotions during the period of extreme grief. The traditional perspective of this theory entails a process of the individual journey of going through the phases of grief work in order to recover from the loss that haunts their lives. Individuals go through a varying set of experiences and expressions of grief and mourning, these emotions are majorly influenced by personal, family, social and cultural situations. Thus, in the recent years, psychologists have started incorporating the various factors that can influence the grieving individuals in social contexts. Throughout the recent era, the conventional beliefs regarding the process of bereavement claimed that people needed to sever their ties with the deceased in order to heal from their loss, but, recent theorists and researchers believe that for numerous people, the process of continuing their bonds with the deceased can prove to be immensely helpful in their process of recovering from their grief (Andriessen, et al., 2018). The present paper aims to deal with the Continuing Bond Model as propounded by Dennis Klass and Tony Walter and John Bowlby’s Attachment Theory.

Klass and Walter identified four distinct ways in which numerous bereaved or bereaving individuals maintain their special bonds with those whom they have lost, the ones who have died and now all that remains of them are the memories and the bonds or relationships that they left behind. The first way was that of identifying or sensing the presence of the individual who is dead. The authors, in their model, defined how many bereaving individuals believe that their loved ones are near them even after years of their demise. The second way demonstrated an act wherein bereaving individual perform the practice of ‘talking to or with’ the dead. Though the authors believed and understood that there was no concrete research done in this field, regarding this specific act of conversation, yet, there are numerous individuals who believe that they can converse with their love ones who are dead (Bassett, 2022). The third way is the usage of the deceased persona as a moral guide for the grieving individual as well as their families. In this act, the grieving individuals start believing that the deceased individual are their moral guide and even start following the ethical and moral beliefs as well as principals of the deceased in order to resonate even more with the lost memories of the deceased. The fourth way of maintaining bonds with the dead is the constant act of talking about the deceased individual by the grieving individual. In the process of counseling, it is extremely important that the counselor takes the step to understand the cultural as well as the traditional implications of the thought process of the grieving individual (Steffen & Klass, 2018).

Continuing Bond Model by Klass and Walter

John Bowlby’s theory of Attachment aims not on the bereavement reactions but rather on the separation from the primary caregivers. The theory acts as one of the major forces behind the understanding process of facilitating grief. Through this theory, Bowlby suggests that children come into the world with a biologically pre-programmed order which lets them form deep attachment with others as the others, who are basically the caregivers of the children and act as their saviors, will help them survive in the world. As per Bowlby, a child has an inborn need to attach itself with one major attachment figure (Schore, 2018). This process is known as monotropy. This concept suggests that the relationship between a child and its caregiver is smore important than all the other relationships. He also stated that the most prominent connection that a child develops is with his or her mother figure. According to Bowlby, an internal framework is taking place in the mental ability of the infants while they are growing up which lets them form bonds and attachment with the people with whom they can identify with and from whom the emotion of safety is resonated. He believed that the behavioral patterns of attachment behaviors are majorly instinctive and they are activated by the conditions that seem to threaten individual identity as well as the attachment with another entity. Even though Bowlby’s theory of attachment does not necessarily aim at the models of grief and the theories pf counseling with regards to grief, his theory is still extremely crucial and influential as it opened the door for further speculation in the field of attachment and growing bonds between individuals (Slade, 2018).

Taking into consideration the diverse concept of grief and the structured ways to deal with patients who are facing severe grief and mental distress due to the agony that is induced in their lives because of the death of someone close, it is important to take a close look at the Continuing Bond Model of Klass and Walter (Sekowski, 2021). The model essentially deals with the states as well as the phases that grieving individuals go through after the demise of a loved one. Talking about the strengths of this model while applying it into the process of grief counselling, it can be stated that this model helps the councilor to develop an open mind set and unlearn the conventional notions of dealing with grief. This theory enables mental health professionals to recognize the importance as well as the utmost influence of culture and tradition on the mental health of the patients. It helps them become sensitive toward their own practice and help them understand the perspective of the suffering patients in a deeper way which can result in a beneficial manner for the future practice of the counselor as it would allow them to explore the mental restrictions as well as distress that grief can cause of different individuals. The model also allows the councilor to understand and document the various outcomes that grief can have on diverse individuals. This theory becomes extremely crucial while dealing with grieving patients as it allows the counselor to understand the patient’s anxiety regarding their forced separation from their loved ones (Keser & I??kl?, 2022).

Attachment Theory by John Bowlby

The limitation that encompasses Bowler’s theory of attachment in the context of grief counseling is that this theory explicitly deals with the format and the framework of attachment and not necessarily grief, in the particular context of the word’s meaning. As in, the theory explores the themes of attachment while the individuals in question are alive. The absence of the element of the death becomes one of the major limitations of the theory while dealing with grief. Bowler’s theory deals with ethe formation of attachment patterns in individuals since their birth, it does not encompass the treatment of this specific attachment when one of the factors that is, one of the individuals is eliminated from the equation through the external force of death (Hubbell, Heide, & Wagers, 2021). There is slight mention of detachment in this theory but it is specifically in the context of the detachment of a child from the maternal or the mother figure. Bowlby explains the behavioral patters that are exhibited through the child that is detached from the mother figure but these factors do not turn out be of any significant help for a grief counselor as the patterns exhibited after Bowlby’s detachment are that of rejection, insecurity and resistance which are not necessarily the features exhibited by the individuals who are grieving the loss of a deceased loved one. If Bowlby’s theory is applied in grief counselling, it may not work out as efficiently as the model of continuity bonds may (Levy, Kivity, Johnson, & Gooch, 2018).

In conclusion, it can be stated that the findings of this paper signify that the Continuity Bonds Model as developed by Klass and Walter can be used by counselors in order to deal with the concept of grief counselling in a more distinct and influential manner. The present paper analyzed two diverse theories that deal with the concepts of attachment and detachment in their own elaborate manners. The paper discussed how the theory of Attachment as propounded by John Bowler deals with the concept of childhood attachment and the mental framework that develops in individuals after their separation from their mother figures. The paper critically evaluates both the theories and their importance in the context of the process of grief counselling of the bereaved individuals who are grieving the loss of a loved one.  After performing a thoroughly researched discussion regarding the strength and weakness of the theories in the context of grief counselling, the paper presented a narrative discourse which established that the Continuity Bonds Model of Klass and Walter can be used in the process of grief counselling in order to attain positive results.

References

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Bassett, D. J. (2022). Losing the Data of the Dead and Expanding Existing Models of Bereavement. In The Creation and Inheritance of Digital Afterlives (pp. 123-145). Palgrave Macmillan, Cham.

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Sekowski, M. (2021). Concrete and symbolic continuing bonds with a deceased person: The psychometric properties of the continuing bonds scale in bereaved surviving family members. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 38(5), 1655-1670.

Slade, A. (2018). The place of fear in attachment theory and psychoanalysis: the fifteenth John Bowlby Memorial Lecture. In Terror Within and Without (pp. 39-57). Routledge.

Steffen, E. M., & Klass, D. (2018). Culture, contexts and connections: a conversation with Dennis Klass about his life and work as a bereavement scholar. Mortality, 23(2), 203-214. doi:https://doi.org/10.1080/13576275.2018.1469481.