1.Why do you think Autonomous marriages end in divorce much more often than arranged marriages? Is it better to arrange marriages or to allow people to choose their relationship partners? What are some of the pros and cons of both types of marital arrangements?
2.Given that there is not strong evidence of a 10 year gap insexual peaks of womenand men, why do you think people believe this widely? What factors contribute to perpetuating this belief, and what consequences might result from it?
3.People frequently use the term the opposite sex to refer to the sex binary. How might this term influence how people think about sex differences and similarities? Are women and men ‘opposite’ to one another? What other terms might be used in place of the opposite sex that would convey similar meaning?
4.Who has more intimate friendships women or men? Why? Is it reasonable to define intimacy in-terms of self disclosure? Can intimacy develop through shared activities? I so, how? Are self disclosure and shared activities mutually exclusive in friendships? What’s the best way to define intimacy?
Autonomous Marriages vs. Arranged Marriages
Marriages of diverse countries or ethnic groups have been observed separately as an illustration of society and family life with limited scope. Authors have noted that economic, cultural along with political factors have contributed to the development of marriages. According to Pande (2015), arranged marriage implies to the type of marital union where bride and groom have been selected by third party instead of each other mostly elderly members of the family. While, on the other hand, autonomous marriage has indicated to the group of young aged people who primarily choose their own partners by their own will principally based on love, compatibility and affection. Singh et al., (2016) have noted that in diverse cultures across the world, marriage does not specifically imply to romance and affection but uniting with two families who are of young age and lack experience. In arranged marriages, marital adjustments primarily have referred to the state where there can be identified generalized feeling between partners of happiness and satisfaction with their marriage with each other. The purpose of this paper is to evaluate reasons of increased rates of divorce and separation among autonomous marriage in comparison to arranged marriage. In addition to this, it will argue on the way arranged marriage have been declining in recent times due to severe lack of compatibility and elevating desire for autonomy arising among new age couples. Furthermore, it will highlight the areas of advantages and disadvantages of both types of marital arrangements.
Self-arranged or autonomous marriages have acquired substantial significance in regions and nations were parental and family arranged marriages have once been predominant. Chantler (2014) has noted that the idea of dedicating an individual’s entire life have the propensity to encounter several challenges. An arranged marriage recently has been thriving in recent times due to the elevating rate of cross cultural impact and interpersonal conflict in autonomous marriage. Reports of De Neve (2016) have revealed that global divorce rates for arranged marriage has been estimated to be around 6% which is significantly low in comparison to self-arranged or love marriage. In comparison to the 58% of marriages in the world that are arranged, this low statistic has indicated to the successful percentage rate of arranged marriages. Meanwhile, Singh et al. (2016) have stated that in contradiction to autonomous marital unions which desire to obtain higher rate of self-dependence and higher compatibility rate, arranged marriage primarily aim to support and preserve cultural stability of husband and wife along with their families. As in love marriage, individuals tend to emphasize on evaluation criteria which shed light on external attributes. However, these attributes tend to exhibit reduced rate of orientation thus fails to contribute to enduring state of autonomous marital outcomes (Pande, 2015).
Advantages and Disadvantages of Autonomous Marriages
Allendorf and Pandian (2016) have stated that in recent times, arranged marriage has been criticized significantly in the West. This considerable level of disparagement and denigration has risen due to its interference in interpersonal autonomy in addition to the destabilization of individuals’ competence to choose for marrying for love and compatibility. Comprehensive studies of Kashyap, Esteve and García-Román (2015) have noted that several members of diverse cultural patterns which practice arranged marriage have typically been critical of the tradition. Arranged marriage can be specifically challenging for women who have been forced to get indulged in abusive and distressful partners as they show incompetence in accomplishing of certain cultural or financial status. Furthermore, immense interference of family has been viewed as primary cause of decline that is regarded as a theme universal to both men and women. Marriage primarily dependent on romantic love has been identified as a modern intervention in western world. In majority of world, especially those with collectivist cultures, arranged marriages has sustained as a norm (Rubio, 2014). Evidences show that marriages can be quite satisfying for the partners. Drawing relevance to the evidences, equity theory has suggested that close relationships, friendships or romances tend to persist to the extent that both individuals in the relationship has been involved with the assumption that they have been shifting away from relationships tends to be proportional to efforts and inclination contributed to the relationship (Shenk et al., 2016). Nonetheless, equity theory has encountered challenges from various domains whereby relationship which has been strictly based on mutual exchange such as arranged marriage can only be thought of as a business deal.
At this juncture, Khalili and Afkari (2017) have shed light on contextual choice that has been regarded as highly imperative in considering the dynamics of arranged marriages. Marriages arranged by families or especially parents typically tend to be viewed as an alien or uninformed factor to Euro-American viewpoint as they explicitly rivet from a very initial stage the significance of family, kin and society. The collectivist as well as multidimensional character of decision-making in these associations has been misconstrued to a certain degree of being ‘backward’ belief of marriage tradition that often fails to align to the West’s highly enlightened form of marriage decisions (Yusefi & Barzgar, 2016). However, regardless of the problematisation regarding to arranged marriage, there has been identified certain fundamentals of the pure association that undergo, namely romantic love. Zarei and Sanaeimanesh (2014) have shed light on Giddens’ support the place of romantic love as an element of pure relationships, and further argued that pure relationships tend to shift away from conventional notions of romantic love towards confluence. Comprehensive studies of Lu & Wang (2014) have noted that confluent love primarily predetermines both expressive as well as sexual correspondence and contentment but fails to presuppose permanency further severing the tie of romantic love to heterosexuality. However on the contrary, romantic love tends to seek that one special person of life by focusing on increased rate of compatibility and affection, with hero and heroines controlling the cultural invented. Reports of Allendorf and Pandian (2016) have noted that marriage rates in the UK have been declining, nevertheless the account of romantic love has been strong and its attributes and qualities primarily appear to have endured the test of time. Thus has been perceived as a pre-cursor to marriage. Bravo, Martínez and Ruiz (2014) have noted that in recent times, individuals have been showing greater degree of inclination towards support self-arranged marriage as arranged or self-arranged marriages have still been supposed to be devoid of romantic love and more purposeful on related choices.
Advantages and Disadvantages of Arranged Marriages
Furthermore, additionally Rubio (2014) have noted arranged marriages repeatedly emphasized on the practical course and can be perceived as a form of opening agency as prospective families within a specific community substitute certain attributes related to religion, language or ethnic community thus removing individuals who fail to position themselves in the essential criteria. These factors have been regarded as rather reductionist and distant manner in order to advance personal relationships and on the surface have drawn contradictions to normative Western cultural practices of marriage. Arguably, as per the view of Singh et al. (2016), factors related to lack of autonomy, compatibility and the privileging of rationality have been leveraging majority of Western sensibilities to question the position arranged marriages as alien and other.
Meanwhile, Yusefi and Barzgar (2016) have shed light on communication as an essential requirement for the development and maintenance of interpersonal relationships. Zarei and Sanaeimanesh (2014) have pre-supposed that the most intimate relationships have been signified as those attributed by greatest disclosure of information by self and other, and that this is particularly true with regard to the disclosure of feelings. As marriage has been recognized as an association whereby disclosure is expected to be far higher than in most other relationships, sustainable love and affection have been highly crucial for thriving marriage. Shenk et al. (2016) have noted that while partners in marital confluence exhibit genuine intimacy with each other, they achieve significantly in greater predictability as well as stability in their relationship, an emotional feeling of intimacy in addition to cognitive feeling of understanding along with their attitude changes to commitment. The theory of cognitive self-disclosure sheds light on the increase of marital intimacy in couple’s affiliation and family functioning. Additionally, Khalili and Afkari (2017) have opined that theoretical implications of cognitive self-disclosure approach have emphasized on high-self-disclosure interactions in autonomous marriages significantly facilitate couples to respond optimistically and validate thoughts, perspectives, emotions and attitude. Receptiveness or the degree, to which individuals empathically confirm others’ opinions and feelings, has been considered as a vital determinant of relationship outcomes. Thus, through Waring’s theory, due to self-disclosure with one’s romantic partner in addition to their responsiveness have been positively related to perceived relationship quality (Yusefi & Barzgar, 2016). Consequently, Zang (2015) has accepted that insights of self-disclosure and receptiveness with other couples would be certainly related to feelings of passionate love within the marital confluence. In general, self-disclosure and openness have been conceptualized as features within an association which shape understanding and closeness with autonomous marriage. As a result, positive, high-self-disclosure interactions in self-arranged or autonomous marriage not only create feelings of intimacy and stability but tend to augment emotions of passionate and adoring love (Rubio, 2014).
Reasons for Higher Divorce Rates in Autonomous Marriages
Every marriage constitutes around 50% chance of experiencing success. Rubio (2014) have identified that dignity, respect, mutual understanding and cooperation, sensitivity to each other’s needs and desires, financial stability, compatibility, comfort levels with each other which comprises other key metrics that lead to a thriving and successful marriage Though arranged marriages have been primarily established by parents there can be witnessed minimal benefits attached arranged marriage. Sharing similar cultural patterns have been one of the major advantages in the realm of arranged marriage (Bravo, Martínez & Ruiz, 2014). Arranged marriages imply to relate to individuals who have identical nationality, religion, culture, beliefs and associate with akin to mother tongue similar. On the other hand, arranged marriages have been integrated to extended family interference because of extensive control of wedding and other critical facets of marital union (Kashyap, Esteve & García-Román, 2015). Furthermore, certain degree of communication gap often results to failure in realizing partners’ emotions and expectations. Such severe lack of communication tends to cause critical misunderstandings further dissolving marital alliance.
As marriage has been recognized as an institution which underpins interpersonal relationships it holds a prominent position in majority of individuals in the Western society. Singh et al. (2016) have noted that in contradiction to arranged marriages where parents and family serve decisive role in the process of marital confluence, autonomous marital relations offers the significant rate of liberty and control to highlight preferable attributes of partners. Such a substantial level of self-sufficiency not only condenses the risk of communication gap but further increases affinity between partners. However, although autonomous marriage essentially posits on love and affection for each other, there has been witnessed chances of dissolve and weakening of the relationship (De Neve, 2016). Nevertheless, regardless of propensity of encountering challenges in autonomous marriages young couple across the world especially in Western society has been inclining towards experiencing togetherness and enduring compatibility.
Conclusion
Hence to conclude, relations do not transpire in segregation but have been fixed within extensive social networks. Therefore, passionate love tends to incessantly shaped by new and stimulating experiences, which can contain interactions with other couples. These interactions may outline not only the chances and social forces but generate, safeguard and devastate relationships. However it has been noted that regardless of these factors the excitement and positivity of self-regulated marriage sustain passionate love in the relationship. Thus, constructive, high-self-disclosure interactions between couples not only construct feelings of familiarity. Moreover, at the core of these processes relied on responsiveness, perceived as a factor important to organizing and combining research and theory in associations. As a result, responsiveness between couples in marital relationship not only leverage bonding, relationships and interests within the bounds of individual, interpersonal relationship dealings, but may also influence relationships and sustainability across multiple relationships and social network.
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